For the past four months I have had the pleasure of having my own life coach. I was feeling stuck and overwhelmed with my life, not to mention apprehensive about my future as far as my career was concerned. It was like I was running on empty, day after day, with no fire underneath me. I knew a woman who I went through life coaching training with, Annamaria Poluha, was entering the certification portion of her training and I knew she was just the type of coach I wanted. One of the beautiful things about hiring a life coach, is that you get to choose the type that you want. Yes, there are business coaches, spiritual coaches, relationship coaches, etc., but what I mean is the personality of the coach is also what you get to chose. Since I knew Annamaria pretty well, I knew she was soft spoken, yet firm, nurturing, intuitive and brilliant.
When we have our phone calls every week, part of me is very excited, but I have to admit there is a tad bit of dread. The reason for this is because when you have a life coach, you are held accountable for action in regards to YOUR life. This can be uncomfortable sometimes. A lot of what we want in life is attainable but we just have to step out of our comfort zone to get it. Yuk. So, I put on my big girl panties (metaphorically) and stepped to it.
The past few weeks I have been feeling really, really great about the direction of my life. Sure, it may be euphoric pregnancy hormones (although morning sickness is no fun), but I honestly attribute it to having a life coach and what it has done for me. It's like something clicked. Like a door opened up in my brain and a "let's get down to business" attitude started. It took a couple of months, but once the wheels started turning, I was on the ride of my life and I was in the drivers seat, no one else. That's the beauty of coaching; your coach doesn't hold all the answers for you or give you advice about what to do (if you want that, hire a consultant). A great coach can pave the way for you to unlock your inner strength and courage which may be a side of you that you haven't met yet. Or, that you have been holding back in fear. Also, coaching doesn't concentrate on your past. If you have issues here, you may need to see a therapist (and a coach may refer you to one if there are some barriers that are just holding you back), but coaching is more about the present and future. What you are going to do next and how are you going to get there.
I have talked a little bit about the importance of self-care, and how imperative it is to treat ourselves with respect and put ourselves first in order to be our best selves to others. Especaially for women, we are expected to do so much; have a career (along with this is the battle within ourselves to keep it or stay home if we choose to have kids), be a good wife (difficult job), raise children (even more difficult job) all the while keeping up our figures and always with a smile on our face. I used to believe that living my ideal life was the hardest thing I ever had to do. It's not easy, no, but it's not as hard as I once thought. It takes effort, and I still get knocked down from time to time but having a life coach has given me the tools to make it easier and more fun. It's like before I had a flip flop and was trying to hammer a nail into a piece of wood, and now my life coach has given me a hammer. I get so excited I do a little happy dance thinking about how much coaching has opened up for me. My coach has encouraged and motivated me to do some things I was too afraid to do, or maybe I was too lazy, I don't know. I had excuse after excuse. Now I'm doing things and making plans for things that make me happy. And I did it all myself. My coach didn't do all the work in between our sessions, I did. During our calls she challenged me, had me look at things from different perspectives, called me out on my bullshit excuses and sometimes found bits and pieces of barriers that were holding me back that I didn't even know were there.
The ripple effect that this has caused is immeasurable. I don't think I am imagining it, but now that I have opened the flood gates to live my own better life, I think people around me see it and are motivated as well. Even if they don't have their own coach they can feel my positive energy. And the best part, is that I believe this is making me a better wife, friend and mommy. For that, I am eternally grateful.
I'm not writing this post because I think you should hire me or my life coach. If you want to, that's great, but my point is STOP TRYING TO GET THE NAIL INTO THE BOARD WITH A FLIP FLOP WHEN YOU CAN USE A HAMMER! And yes, I used all caps because I was yelling. But if you do decide to hire one, please take into consideration the following:
1. Have sample sessions with several different coaches. They are usually a half hour and almost always free with no obligation. Find the one you click with the most, the one you feel the most energy with and most comfortable with. Listen to your gut instinct.
2. Look at the coaches credentials. Anyone nowadays can call themselves a life coach. It has become one of my biggest pet peeves when I see or hear it and the person has no formal training. Yes, there is something to be said for true life experience and age old wisdom, but let's face it: no one would trust a "doctor" who never went to medical school just because they had been sick and gotten better a bunch of times. Check out your coaches schooling and in my opinion, stick with someone whose school is accredited with the International Coaching Federation.
3. Commit. When you're being coached, you can be there, but not really be there. If you don't commit you are wasting your time and money. By having a great life coach you are giving yourself the best gift ever: Your best self.
Photo courtesy of curly_exp(l)osure
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